While faced with extremely challenging circumstances, I made some difficult decisions. As a result, I gave up multiple unhealthy and toxic relationships. I gave up trying to keep man made rules and religious expectations. I gave up trying to control and fix my world. I gave up wearing a mask; pretending everything was okay so I could fit in with everyone else’s expectations. The process was excruciating, but the outcome exceeds anything I’ve ever experienced. God sheltered me during this fierce storm. He never turned His back on me. He told me He loved me and asked me to trust Him. Thankfully, I said yes.
What actually took place is this: I tried keeping rules and working my head off to please God, and it didn’t work. So I quit being a law “woman” so that I could be God’s “woman.” Christ’s life showed me how, and enabled me to do it. I identified myself completely with Him. Indeed, I have been crucified with Christ. My ego is no longer central. It is no longer important that I appear righteous before you and have your good opinion, and I am no longer driven to impress God. Christ lives in me. The life you see me living is not “mine,” but is lived by faith in the Son of God, Who loved me and gave Himself for me. I am not going to go back on that. Is it not clear to you that to go back to that old rule-keeping, peer-pleasing religion would be an abandonment of everything personal and free in my relationship with God? I refuse to do that, to repudiate God’s grace. If a living relationship with God could come by rule-keeping, then Christ died unnecessarily. Galatians 2:19-21 MSG
Heavenly Father, my story is His story. You took an impossible situation and made it into something that continues to grow, prosper, and nourish my soul and the souls of others. (Psalm 34:8) You are able to do abundantly more than all we can ever ask, hope or imagine. (Galatians 3:20) The Bible is full of stories of human beings who chose to follow You no matter what. (Job 13:15) You always take the ashes of Your children’s lives and grow them into a beautiful reflection of Your Love and ability to do anything. (Isaiah 61:3) Your Perfect Love casts out all fear. (1 John 4:18) All I can say is thank You Jesus.